


Don't Give Up On Love

by SchokiTotoro



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Light Angst, M/M, Sad Aziraphale, Soulmates AU, no happy ending, sadly not as much angst as I initially planned, short and bittersweet, soft Crowley
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-10-04 23:54:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20479550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SchokiTotoro/pseuds/SchokiTotoro
Summary: God gave every angel a soulmate to stay by their side and love them unconditionally. Crowley and Aziraphale got paired up but because Crowley fell, they never found each other.Demons don't have any memory of this, angels value it very much.





	Don't Give Up On Love

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!  
I'm not a native speaker, so please excuse any grammar mistakes, I tried my best to get this fic done as soon as possible today and it isn't proofread.  
This is also the first fic I wrote in years, so yall are in for a ride.   
Complains can be sent to @SchokiTotoro on Twitter!
> 
> In this au Crowley never had the name Crawly because every time I wrote it down it looked awful and yes, that's the only reason.   
Have "fun"!

God did not, contrary to popular belief, create angels as singular entities.   
She made them beings of love and affection after all, so every angel was given a partner, a soulmate, to accompany them through the eons, be by their side and love them unconditionally till the end of times.

Most angels found their soulmate quite soon, being drawn to them unknowingly. Others... did not. In fact, some never found them and they never will. This is because of one simple reason: they fell. Angels who did not find their partner before The Revolution had no chance whatsoever to meet them ever again.  
Because God created them to be together for eternity, most former angels, who found their mate in time, left heaven together and only a handful fell without their (former) angelic soulmate. The most prominent example being Beelzebub, the Lord of Hell themself and Earth's favourite demon, Crowley, the serpent of Eden. Not that any of them or the other demons cared about that now, they lost all memories of their soulmates during the fall. Some may sense a small sensation coming across their ex-mate but never love. Demons don't do love (as everyone knows) and Crowley was no exception. Well, until one faithful day when he spotted something, or rather someone, quite intriguing.

"Care for an apple, angel?"  
Aziraphale looked around, confused until he saw a snake crawling up the branches of the tree next to him.  
"Most definitely not!", the angel wasn't sure why, but seeing Crowley in his snake form always concerned him more than seeing his human form. Maybe because Aziraphale taught himself to be more attentive towards facial expressions or maybe because the demon did all his tempting as a snake, which made Aziraphale even more nervous...  
"Foul serpent, I should have known your objective isn't just tempting the poor humans, I have you know-"  
Crowley chuckled to himself. "It wass a joke, don't worry. I'm sure I would get a promotion for tempting an angel but I'm quite happy with my current situation."  
"Are you now? Well, I guess demons don't need a lot of other activities to be happy."  
"What iss that ssuppossed to mean?", he hissed, slithering down the branches of the tree, wrapping himself around Aziraphale's arm, smiling as much as possible for a snake.  
The angel didn't notice, he was deeply lost in thought, staring at the sky. "Hm? Oh... nothing."

It wasn't nothing, though. Unlike demons, the lone angels were miserable without their partner. Love was something that was woven into all of them, just like the sparkle of stars in their eyes or that subtle ray of holiness radiating from every inch of their bodies. For angels, the most beautiful beings in existence, love was the incarnation of this beauty. Ethereal beings without a soulmate were without love, without beauty. Worthless. Pitiful. A Principality without a mate? Shameful.  
After all the millennia Aziraphale tried to make peace with being alone though, with being looked down upon by the other angels, even Gabriel, who didn't have a mate either. He always just explained how he lost his soulmate in the revolution, being strong enough to stay an angel and nobody ever questioned or ridiculed him, as they did with Aziraphale. Despite everything, he was still unconsciously searching for a soulmate, not giving up hope that there had to be someone, somewhere in Heaven, waiting for him.  
Now he was stationed on Earth though and he knew that the chance of finding his counterpart was gone for several thousand years, so he decided to take that hope and lock it away, determined not to think about soulmates and ethereal love and everything related to that until he returned to Heaven.

~~

"Look at them, how sssweet, walking hand in hand, hopefully ready to sin some more.", Crowley said, slithering up the wall of Eden, looking quite proud of himself.  
Aziraphale rolled his eyes.  
"Oh shush. I just hope they don't run into even more trouble. Maybe I should make sure they are alright from time to time, I'm certain that wouldn't be a problem, would it?"  
He couldn't stop thinking about what he did, what the other angels would think, what they would do to him if they found out.  
"You gave them a flaming sword, I don't think they will have any problems anytime soon-"  
Aziraphale jumped up and looked around, feeling very anxious as to who could have heard that.  
"Be quiet please, that is not some trivia to throw around, you don't know who is listening!"  
"Oh come on, doesn't God see everything anyway? You're a high ranking angel, what do you think are the others going to do? Give you orders?"  
Now he angel just looked even more concerned, because yes, of course, he could refuse almost any order from the lower ranking angels, but he never did. The others didn't have a lot of respect for him in the first place and he wasn't keen on losing the little he had.  
"I can't- I can't just refuse."  
"Why not?", Crowley didn't understand a lot of angelic hierarchy but he did pick up some knowledge here and there and Aziraphale's answer confused him. "Don't say you want to do everything they say, because I wouldn't believe you. You're far too intelligent for that."  
"Of course I could refuse some orders, but..."  
"But?"  
"But I don't, okay!", he really shouldn't talk about that, especially not to a demon. It revealed too many feelings, he'd rather not think about. "I'm already alone", he mumbled to himself. Crowley heard him of course, but he saw how distressed the angel was and didn't ask about it any further.  
"Follow them.", Crowley said, hoping to keep the conversation going.  
That surprised Aziraphale. "What? Is this some kind of trick to get me away from here?"  
"No! You were talking about how worried you are about those two lovebirds, so... follow them. Keep an eye out for anything that could harm them!", he hadn't thought about the fact that this meant no more conversations with the angel but somehow, right at this moment, he didn't care about himself.  
"Hm. Maybe you are right, just maybe. I'm not sure if I can trust you to keep this garden as it is."  
"I can just leave too", he blurted out and Aziraphale looked at him, unsure what to say. "Well, this way, you wouldn't have to worry about me. Besides, no one left to tempt here", Crowley winked, hoping the angel didn't take it too seriously.  
Aziraphale didn't smile, though, much to Crowley's concern. He might have gone too far and decided to crawl away, feeling surprisingly sad.

~~

Aziraphale abandoned the Garden of Eden on the same route Adam and Eve took, walking hand in hand. Following their footsteps, thinking about the love he could still feel radiating from them in the distance, the hope he had locked away resurfaced, but it somehow made him feel more lonely than he ever had all those millennia before. Not only painfully aware that he had lost his soulmate long ago, but also thinking about the fact that maybe, his place was here in Earth and he was never supposed to have one in the first place.  
"So this is what sorrow feels like...", he said to himself, looking up, not to heaven, just to the stars dimming in the night, wishing he could have had the chance to feel real, angelic love.

Crowley looked after him, sitting on the branches of the highest tree, thinking about whether Hell would scold him if he just followed the angel. He couldn't pinpoint why he wanted to follow him, or maybe even walk beside him, yet the thought lingered in his mind for quite some time and when the sun began to set, he changed into his human form and left the Garden, in hope of finding some company. Some very specific, angelic company, even though he'd never admit that, not even to himself.  
He'd always believed that demons couldn't feel affection or love or all the other synonyms that were going through his mind while he was trying to think of a reason why he was longing to spend more time with Aziraphale. Something was drawing him to the angel, something he had long forgotten but was beginning to remember.


End file.
